As I made a quick exit from my local shopping center hallway where I had been engaged in a conversation, a realization struck me: I have ended numerous conversations by acting as if I was in a rush, even though I wasn’t. I have trained myself to give a look that says, “Oh, I’d love to talk longer if I didn’t have to be somewhere right now!” 

Spoiler alert: There are times I have nowhere I need to be.

I have never made a quick exit because I didn’t want to converse with that person. Nope, the truth is, I tried to save THEM from having to make up an excuse to rush off. You see, I was pretty sure there were many things they would rather have been doing. 

Certainly, I am not referring to all conversations and all people. But, Friend, I have completed the quick exit more times than I can count. 

An inferiority complex that has reared its ugly head frequently throughout my adult life is to blame. 

Identity

I have always known God loves me, but I have not always believed God likes me. Another thing I have not fully gotten on board with is that when He gave all of us unique personalities and gifts, mine were of equal value compared to everybody else.

Therefore, the question of “why would that person want to waste their time talking to me?” has caused me to invent my quick exit to “spare” that person from putting up with me longer than they have to. I’m “saving” them. (So considerate of me, isn’t it?) It is like I have a mental calculator that gauges how many minutes a person will endure a conversation with me until they mentally check out. Insert an eyeroll at myself right here.

I forgot the significance of who I was, because somewhere along the line I lost the gravity of Whose I was.

How Does God See Us?

I am more ready than ever to move beyond this quick exit thing. So, I have been thinking more and more about my identity – the identity God gave me. I am a daughter of the King (Romans 8:16-17)- a redeemed, restored believer. (Psalm 71:20-21) Deeply loved, entirely forgiven, and fully free.(Romans 5:8)( John 8:36) I am God’s masterpiece, (Ephesians 2:10) the apple of His eye, (Psalm 17:8) and His friend (John 15:14) – a chosen, cherished child of the One True God. (1 John 3:1)

I believe all those things for all of you, but I need to accept them more deeply for myself. I might have to repeatedly state these facts until I fully embrace them as who I am. However, my not feeling them doesn’t make them any less accurate. They are Biblical truths from the heart of God, who is 100% truth 100% of the time.

Saying Goodbye

Saying goodbye to the quick exit isn’t going to be easy. However, as I walk more confidently in the reality of who I am and Whose I am, I will think less about myself (it turns out this self-conscious trait is pretty self-centered, isn’t it?) and more about the person I am conversing with. I’ll think more about how God wants me to see, speak to, and listen to them. I’ll think more about the blessing of casual conversations in shopping centers that I sometimes take for granted. 

Goodbye, quick exit. Well, except for when I really do have to be somewhere.😉